How to Control your Sexual Desire

The ability to control your sexual desires or – at the very least – being able to satisfy them properly can affect your mood throughout the day. Fortunately, you are not the only person who is finding it difficult to control your sexual desire, so keep reading this article to help yourself and help others in the process.

Since making love is a natural source of happiness and psychological stability, it is critically important to get the best of it, use it in your favor – not the opposite. This is why you should not fall into the trap of ” too much ” or ” too many ” otherwise all the benefits of it turns into self-punishing like saying: ”if only I were a bit more patient” or “I know this feeling of guilt will hit so why I couldn’t find a way out” etc.

Here are our 5 tips that will undoubtedly help you control your sexual desires when the time isn’t right :

1- Stay away from pornography: 

Watching porn day in and day out is at the top list of the distractions and addictions that people can have. Research has shown that porn knocks your productivity to the ground, and it fills your imaginations with countless and useless scenarios. Thus, you create unrealistic and ridiculous expectations in your mind, which you naively take to the bedroom and expect your sexual/life partner to live up to. As a result, the addiction can destroy the intimacy that you share with your partner and you control your sexual desire.

2- Live in the moment but focus on the aftermath:

If you are in a committed relationship and you feel attracted by somebody else ask yourself questions like “Would my actions hurt my spouse, partner, or other-half in any way?”, “How will they react to my betrayal?”, and “Are these actions going to benefit or hurt me in my studies, work, or more importantly my spiritual well-being?”

Considering the aftermath of engaging in any sexual act is necessary to help manage your feelings of lust. You might not want to think that your actions will hold long-term consequences but try to always think about the endgame, like a chess player.

3- Avoid Sources of Temptation: Social Media

Social media platforms nowadays have become beauty competition platforms. They have radically changed our beauty norms, which can make it hard for people to find a partner. Beauty norms in men and women alike are highly affected by new tendencies. Bigger and sharper jawlines, as well as being tall and extremely fir for men and Hourglass shapes for women along with the slim-thick figure and the insta-face are all over Instagram and are the most reacted will images. Therefore, these images make people that look at them seek partners that are similar to ones on social media -that is rarely the case. Since most people in real life don’t look like the models and influencers online, a lot of people settle for being alone rather than looking for a sexual partner they could get their sexual needs satisfied with, they prefer to do it alone by masturbating.

4- Pray or meditate consistently: 

You must know that your sexuality is deep and core to your nature as a human being. Therefore, your sexuality could start controlling you rather than the other way around. Abstinence for personal reasons or benefit can be maintained on one part by either prayer or meditation.

On the one hand, we have: prayer. Prayer prevents indecency and wrongdoing. We can’t stress enough the positive impact of praying on personal well-being and mental balance.

And on the other, if you’re not a highly religious person, we suggest meditation as it is a form of prayer to one’s self. By meditating, you can gather your thoughts and focus on the reasons you might want to control your sexual desire. At the same time, you can focus on your mind rather than your body.

5- Redirect your energy:

Controlling your sexual urges might not be the best thing for you. However, redirecting that passion to a positive direction is one of the best ways you can gain control of it and use it in a better way. You can use that energy to brainstorm manners in which you could either bring help to people around you (for example, volunteering at a homeless shelter) or could be of use to you, like joining a football team or a gym where you can let out all the energy and passion into something that keeps you active.


Controlling your sexual desire is about more than just desire or sexuality. It is about knowing that you can take control of things within you, things as natural as sexual desire, or any desire-driven need we have as humans.

How do you get in control of your desires? Tell us in the comments